4/11/06 5:08pm

Do you believe
in what you see?
Emotion is sweet
Nothing is real
I'm wasting my time
In the waiting line
Do you believe
in what you see?

It seems to be that the question of the day is this: am I wasting my time in the waiting line? Lord knows i've spent too much time in it previously, and now am i just doing more of the sad same? sometimes, something is good enough to deserve the wait, in fact, its so good it almost demands a wait. but other times it seems like waiting is something i should not have to do, it should be my right to jump ahead of the line. i dont want to sound like some spoiled demanding bitch who thinks she's above everything and everyone, but at the same time, i think that i deserve to be treated well. maybe i honestly just think too highly of myself, but i feel like im deservant of someone who loves me so much that he will do anything for me and truly wants to be with me, not be with me after he attends to the others in the line ahead of me. i guess its all just a matter of priorities, but my feeling is this: i've been in so many waiting lines in my life and im just tired of being the one sitting around waiting for things that dont happen or just end up hurting me.

love is a lot of things and i know i am far from understanding what true love is but i know this for sure: not everything is my fault and my responsibility. i shouldn't have to chase. and if i do, then that just makes me feel that much stupider for not running like hell when i saw the sign that says: "wait here".