monday morning coming down.

What I want from this
is to learn to let go.
No, not of you
of all that's been told.
Killers re-invent and believe
and this leans on me, like a rootless...

music reminds me of the endurance of the human spirit. without such endurance we wouldnt identify with musical lyrics, but that endurance exists. are lives are quite parallel at the end of the day. so when i hear these songs i often think, "that is me, that is my life" its a pretty interesting phenomenon.

i had my final appointment with my dr today. maybe i was just in a good mood today, but it seemed to end on a positive note. the semester is winding down and as stressed as i should be i just dont care very much anymore.

the past week has been both positive and strange. i have recieved calls, messages and even letters from people i never expected just telling me they loved me. i cant let myself think that guy at the library foretold of all these things, but maybe he did. the important thing is this: i have learned how important it is to let the ones you love know how you feel. have you ever thought about if you died who would show up at your funeral? who would cry? who would care? who would never be the same? i think we all wonder that because we know if we did in fact die we would probably be surprised at who cared and who didnt. theres a reason why we would be surprised. in life we're all too afraid to let each other know how we feel. this could be taken in a negative direction to mean that people who act like they care about you may not actually care as much as they lead you to believe, but it can also mean that there are people out there in the world that care about you much much more than you would ever know.

i guess what ive realized is you cant wait to let people know how you feel. you cant wait for someone to step out of your life forever, cant wait for someone to die. too late doesnt have an exact deadline. no one knows when too late may be. you cant wait. it cant wait. say i love you when you leave. call your friend you havent spoken to in a while. keep tabs with you grandparents. call you mom. and when you regard someone as a best friend, let them know. its the most important thing you can do.let the ones you love know so.