kiss by a rose

old habits are hard.

very hard.

to break.

its been one year. one amazing year. one interesting year. one life changing year.

all because i decided no one would die if i skipped dinner with friends and was a little late to the football game.

what the future holds is a very grand mystery for me now. the important thing is this: dont get scared. people who get scared dont live. they never do what they intended because they are always too busy preparing. i cant be this person. i wish there was a way to make this college thing go by faster. i know this is a part of life and a very fun experience, but at the same time, if i could be out there living my dreams wouldnt that be pretty fun too? i could be amazing. i could be different. the worlds going to end in 2012. we must get a move on. we must cram lifespans of 70, 80 or even 90 years into the next 5.

ive been thinking a lot about simultaneous life lately. how we each live our own separate lives all at once. its 7:04pm on a sunday, heres my predictions:

_helens typing a paper. i know this is true b/c shes sitting right here.
_robyns recovering from illness and attempting to study.
_jordan's bored.
_alex is considering doing homework but will probably wait until 2 tomorrow morning.
_my parents are sitting down to dinner.
_kelleys mourning the incumbent week.
_beltons thinking about life with his dog.
_gregs wistfully driving home way too fast.
_charlie's hopefully not in the art building.
_my grandma is sitting in front of the tv worrying about the world.

its interesting how many things and thoughts and moods and feelings can occur at one time.

appppppparently, i may be a hypochondriac. ive always known i have some certain tendencies, but maybe this is true. i think im mostly afraid of going out of my mind in some respect. in the end being afraid of having problems makes you have problems. i see this now. of course i dont think theres a true artist out there who is completely sane. so maybe this means im on my way to becoming a true artist.

i went out with "liz" this weekend. made some friends. saw the college party life in action. it was quite interesting. i shall hopefully do it again soon.

until then, off to the homework ive been avoiding literally all afternoon. gotta get done with college asap, the aztec meteor's on its way.